Another Reason not to Let Me Out in Public

So.

Yesterday after everyone’s afternoon naps we had to go to Petsmart to get cat chow and Target to get a few groceries. When we got to Petsmart we made a spur of the moment trip into AC Moore because who doesn’t love AC Moore? And also because I wanted to get a St. Patrick’s Day flag for my front flower bed and Jack needed to buy a pinwheel located conveniently next to the register.

Then off to Petsmart to stare at pets. This type of outing is always a hit with both kids. Jack walks, Harper rides and everyone enjoys looking at animals. This time we were in a hurry so we only did one pass by each type of animal (fish, cats, rodents, birds, lizard/snake/things).

Hi, kitties!

Hi, kitty!

We also picked up a giant bag of cat chow. Usually I push a cart around but today I just had the stroller because it was cold outside and I didn’t want to have to take a cart back up to the store after putting the chow in my car and they have no cart corrals. So I stuck it in my stroller basket and off we went back to the car so we could drive to Target (in a near by but not close enough to walk parking lot).

I went to pick the bag of chow up and all of a sudden there was chow everywhere. A river of chow. Chow was POURING out of this bag and I just sort of stood there stunned. Well SHIT. So I adjusted the bag to stop the hemorrhaging and sort of wound up with the stroller tilted sideways some so I didn’t continue to drop chow, all the while telling Jack to get in the car. Get in the car! GET IN THE CAR FOR THE LOVE OF GOD CHILD to which he was like “no, this is Harper’s side of the car” and SERIOUSLY. so I finally convinced him to get in the car while still holding Harper at an angle and trying to figure out how to get the chow and the baby out of the stroller without spilling all of my chow.

Then a nice lady and her kid stopped by and asked if they could help.

YES PLEASE!

I asked her to hold the stroller at an angle so I could get Harper out and into the car and then I could go from there. So she did, and I thanked her and off she went so I set the stroller on its side and POP! the chow set itself on the ground, out of the stroller problem solved-ish. Except for the giant pile of chow in the parking lot next to my car.

Oops.

Fortunately I have 500 random cloth shopping bags in my car and I was able to get the chow bag into one of them without spilling more chow and I got the kids strapped in and was about to get in the car myself when an employee came out and offered to swap out the bag of chow.

How’s that for service? It’s freaking awesome is what it is.

And off to Target we went!

Now, if I was lucky, this is where my story would end. But alas, there is more.

At Target I returned an unopened container of formula because I over purchased and Harper is weaned and thank goodness they take stuff back! Anyways, I carried the formula into the store in a small USO bag. This detail is kind of important. Anyways, we went on to buy eggs, kraft singles, a 4 pack of baby yogurt, 2 of those baby food pouch things, a box of graham crackers, bananas, a bag of apples, and a container of blue berries. At the check out the cashier asked if I wanted to use my bag and I said yes, but that I didn’t think it would all fit in one bag so I also wanted plastic bags.

Do you see where this is going? After scanning my credit card and getting that taken care of I went over to collect my bags and she was trying to stuff my eggs into the top of the VERY FULL very SMALL USO bag. She had not used more than 1 bag. So I told her I would just skip the egg bag and I put the bag and the eggs in the back of the cart where Jack was sitting (Harper was in the front) and off we went.

And then as we neared the exit I noticed that we were leaving a trail of blue berries.

I wish I was kidding.

My bag was leaning, but only slightly so I checked and the blue berry container was OPEN sitting at the top of the bag kind of on its side (there were SO MANY berries at the bottom of the bag when I got home). I should have looked before I tossed the bag in the cart, but I just wanted to get out of there. So I started scooping up blue berries because I felt too guilty to just leave them. I mean people could have stepped on them and that would have been pretty gross. I didn’t want to be a total asshole, but I pretty much felt like one by then!

So a very nice employee walked by and helped pick up the berries. He said I could trade the container out at customer service, but I said no thanks. First the chow and now the berries, I didn’t think I deserved another free pass, plus it wasn’t that many berries. And also I wanted to get back to the safety of my home because obviously this was just not my day for shopping.

I guess the moral of that story is that if you’re out by yourself with 2 small children and the people at Petsmart say “do you need help out?” you can totally say yes. The fact that you’ve done this 500 times before with no problem does not guarantee you won’t spill a giant bag of cat chow all over the parking lot next to your car. Holy freaking cow.

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One Response to Another Reason not to Let Me Out in Public

  1. kimmy says:

    I’m sorry your outing was such a debacle, but hahaha it gave me a good laugh!

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